Saturday, November 25, 2006

The machine

Nemanja Vidic has been one of the instrumental players in Manchester United's excellent defense this season. Here's what I found somewhere on the net:

Guns don't kill people. Nemanja Vidic kills People.

Nemanja Vidic does not sleep. He waits.

The chief export of Nemanja Vidic is Pain.

Nemanja Vidic doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

When Nemanja Vidic does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.

In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Nemanja Vidic could use to kill you - including the room itself.

Nemanja Vidic once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell him there was a stripper in it.

There are no races, only countries of people Nemanja Vidic has beaten to different shades of black and blue.

The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Nemanja Vidic has been there. In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.

For some, the left testicle is larger than the right one. For Nemanja Vidic, each testicle is larger than the other one.

Nemanja Vidic grinds his coffee with his teeth and boils the water with his own rage.

Nemanja Vidic once ate an entire bottle of sleeping pills. It made him blink.

Nemanja Vidic played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.

In a 50-50 challenge, Nemanja Vidic would win 150-nil.

Nemanja Vidic does not "style" his hair. It lays perfectly in place out of sheer terror.

Nemanja Vidic recently had the idea to sell his urine as a canned beverage. We know this beverage as Red Bull.

Nemanja Vidic puts the "laughter" in "manslaughter".

Nemanja Vidic once roundhouse kicked Bruce Lee, breaking him in half. The result was Jet Li and Jackie Chan.

Nemanja Vidic hates The Beatles; two to go.

Nemanja Vidic crossed the road. Nobody has ever dared question his motives.

When Nemanja Vidic exercises, the machine gets stronger.

Nemanja Vidic's tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.

Nemanja Vidic beat the hair off Chuck Norris' chest.

Nemanja Vidic died ten years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up the courage to tell him.

Nemanja Vidic doesn't close players down, they are drawn to his legs by the force of gravity.

When Nemanja Vidic Runs he stays still the Earth moves under his feet like a treadmill

One of the new quadrants caught on fire last week after Nemanja fixed it a glare.

Stupid tackles don't break peoples legs, Nemanja Vidic does.

Nemaja Vidic once woke up in a foul mood. The result was the Yugoslav wars.

Fergie didn't drop Darren Fletcher, Nemanja Vidic dropped Darren Fletcher.

Nemanja Vidic doesn't mark players, he permanently stamps them.

Nemanja Vidic once turned up for training late - Fergie fined the rest of the team for being early.

Nemanja Vidic doesn't head the ball away, the ball heads the other way.

Wes Brown isn't injured - Nemanja Vidic mistook him for a jaffa cake.

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Saturday, November 11, 2006

Car drivers with bikers' mind

China's economy has been booming. The number of private cars and taxis has also increased, slowly replacing bicycles - although there's no question that there are still loads of bicycles in China. China has become a great place for business. Perhaps to be specific, hospital or traffic-accident emergency service business.

My experience spending three days in Shanghai was horrible, both for taxi-ride and crossing the streets. I don't know what the statistics is for traffic-related accidents in China, but I would imagine it's relatively quite high. Most people disobey traffic signs and, even worse, traffic lights when turning. Not only the car drivers, but also the bicycle riders too. I suspect the change of transportation means (from bicycles to cars) are not followed by the mind and attitudes.

Sounds of car horns and bicycle bells are continuous throughout the day. It seems that the drivers/riders assume the other 'parties' (i.e. other cars or bicycles for car drivers, and other bicycles and pedestrians for the bicycle riders) have been warned by such sound that they must give way.

Looking right and left before crossing the street is not enough. It must be a constant check until you reach the other side of the street. Riding a taxi is as stressful. Make sure the taxi has good seat belts and something for you to hold on.

If I live in Shanghai, I could become an alcoholic in my first month just because the high stress level...

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Wednesday, November 01, 2006

MBA wannabes

Getting into top MBA program is pretty tough, or perhaps time-consuming is a more correct word. Applicants must take GMAT (Graduate Management Admission Test), which may take months to prepare. Another test for international students are TOEFL (Test of English as a Foreign Language); this also takes some time to prepare. In addition to these tests, applicants must submit their GPA(s), which may be difficult to get in some countries. Then there comes the essays and interview.

I've been helping a few of these applicants, especially in giving my opinions to their essays. Some started well (i.e. good story, structured, good English), some others were hopeless, especially those with bad English. Despite that, the very first thing before getting into this messy journey of MBA application is the decision to get an MBA. Some people are very clear why they want an MBA. And as usual, some others don't. For those who really want it, it's no longer a dream - it's become their goal. (BTW, the difference between dream and goal is merely a date - that the date exists and is reasonable).

Last week I met with several to-be-applicants in Jakarta to share my experience at Duke. Pretty impressive pool of young men and women. I probably can tell, barely from getting the idea how prepared and how knowledgable they are about MBA, who has higher chance to getting into top-ranked schools. Yeah, right. Now I can read palms too...

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